Being Present

I love this question!  It is direct, gets to the heart of things, and is tricky.

First, the tricky – mindfulness meditation doesn’t do anything.  It is an activity that only creates benefits if we use it. In other words, if we practice. I think of the practice of mindfulness meditation as being similar to exercise or dieting. With training, we only get stronger if we do the exercises and increase our workout effort over time. The same is true with mindfulness meditation. The more we do it, the stronger the mindfulness muscle gets.

When we diet we regulate what we eat. Just like dieting the benefits of meditation increase the more we pay attention. When we monitor our practice, like our food, we notice the things we need to change – how we practice, meet challenges, and how often and for how long we practice.

OK, then.  If I practice mindful meditation, what is it likely to do?

There we go . . . the heart of the question. 

Truthfully, for some of us, nothing.  As I discuss in other blogs, intention, attitude, goals, and approach to difficulties matter. Many things begin to happen for those of us who decide to commit and take the practice seriously.

Practicing mindfulness meditation brings us into direct contact with the present moment. In the present moment, we have a choice about what we say and do. We respond instead of reacting.

I remember the first experience I had with mindfully being in the moment. The incident occurred in my kitchen while my husband and I worked together on a meal.  Suddenly, I became aware that there was a critical comment on the tip of my tongue, ready to send like an arrow at a bullseye.  As I became aware of what would slip off my tongue and into his back, I immediately realized it would hurt him.  I didn’t want to hurt him.  I was just behaving out of habitual patterns.  I stopped the statement before firing and reframed it into something more positive.  The simple awareness of what was happening and the ability to change it before someone got hurt hooked me.  Then I knew I would practice mindfulness meditation for the rest of my life.  Why?  Because I never wanted to hurt anyone, especially those I love, and becoming aware at the moment was the only way to avoid it. 

There was another experience that taught me the benefits of being in the present, in the moment, mindfully.

I had only been meditating for about 10 minutes daily for a few days.  I was walking to work on a lovely fall day and found everything was more vivid and alive.  The colors seemed brighter.  I was aware of more qualities in the day – the sun shining off the leaves of the trees, the bright and varied colors and textures of the tree bark, the sounds of the world waking up and kids getting ready for school, the feel of my feet meeting the pavement, the warmth of my coat and the chill of the breeze on my face.  All so much more vivid, and alive than ever before. I was truly present in the moment and found beauty, peace, and joy.

One of my beginning students shared in a class that she attended a family gathering. The usual family dynamics were to snipe and pick at each other verbally. She said she avoided the usual family discord by being mindful and in the moment. She paid attention to what was happening for her and caught her reactions before they became a part of the habitual interactions. As a result, she was much less stressed, not reacting, and felt more peaceful during and after.

Back to the question, what is it likely to do if I decide to practice mindful meditation? It will bring you into the present.  Into this current moment of life. And give you choices about what you want that moment to be. It is truly learning to live in the now. And by living in the now, live the best life you can, with the most peace and contentment possible.