Being Present

The Ins and Outs of Mindfulness

Loving Kindness & Goodwill Phrases to Use in Meditation

According to Ruth King, racial justice scholar, metta (loving-kindness) is a genuine desire for all beings, without exception, to be safe from inner and outer harm, to be healthy and content, and to live with ease.

You may have listened to my post titled, How I Feel Is Up To Me, and would like to incorporate a loving-kindness meditation into your regular practices. I have included the sequence and a series of phrases to use below.

The typical sequence for using loving-kindness phrases is to begin with a benefactor, someone who has our best interests at heart, who loves us unconditionally, and who only wants the best for us. Next, we turn toward ourselves. We make ourselves the center of sending loving-kindness and if we find this difficult we can use a couple of nuances. For instance, we may send the phrases to ourselves from our benefactor. We can often receive goodwill from a benefactor precisely because we know they want only the best for us. Or we can picture ourselves as the children we once were, sending loving-kindness toward our younger selves. Next is a neutral person, someone whom we never really think about or have crossed our mind. It could be someone like a store clerk, bank teller, bus driver, or person sitting next to us at an event, or coming down the street toward us. Finally, we turn our goodwill, and loving kindness towards all beings, excluding none. All beings simply want to live peacefully and be happy and we can send those wishes outward to them.

Christina Feldman (Boundless Heart) suggests these phrases: May you / I /all beings be safe and well. May you / I / all beings be peaceful. May you / I / all beings rest in ease and kindness.

Generic phrases taught in many mindfulness meditation courses include these” May you / I / all beings be safe. May you / I / all beings be healthy. May you / I / all beings be happy. May you / I / all beings be at peace and at ease.

Jack Kornfield (The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace) suggests: May you / I / all beings be filled with loving-kindness. May you / I / all beings be safe from inner and outer dangers. May you / I / all beings be well in body and mind. May you / I / all beings be at ease and happy.

Others I have collected over the years:

May all beings be happy. May joy fill and sustain you. May your well being continue.

May my mind be filled with thoughts of loving friendliness, compassion, appreciative joy, and equanimity. May I be generous. May I be gentle. May I be grateful. May I be relaxed. May I be happy and peaceful. May I be healthy. May my heart become tender. May my words be pleasing to others.

Feel free to write phrases that resonate with you and reflect your wish for yourself and all beings to be safe, healthy, happy, and live in well-being.

Roshi Joan Halifax says, “Loving kindness is supremely relational: it works only if it is offered, given away, or shared. We cannot bank love; it grows as we give it away. The more we give it away the greater our capacity for love. This is how loving-kindness becomes limitless.”

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drdeb

I am a certified mindfulness meditation teacher who has been teaching and guiding students at all levels in starting, developing, and maintaining a mindfulness meditation practice. I have personally been a mindfulness meditation practitioner for more than 20 years, initially teaching myself and growing into learning from various teachers over the decades. I am also a clinical psychologist, semi-retired from private practice. I have incorporated mindfulness meditation into my psychotherapy practice and taught many people how to use this practice to cope with many aspects of mental and emotional distress as well as social and life distress. Even after decades of practice, my passion for mindfulness meditation has not faded. If anything, my awe and respect for this practice has grown. The benefits (which I will write about in my blog) are immeasurable and continue to accrue in my personal, professional, and teaching life.

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