Being Present

Each and everyone of us are or will struggle and suffer due to events often beyond our control.  These may be personal in the form of death, illness, accident, and misfortune.  Or it could be related to the state of affairs in the communities within which we live and operate.  We may feel especially affected by what is happening nationally, internationally, and globally.  When we are affected by any of these we can often feel alone, isolated, confused, and disoriented.  Joining others in the process of cultivating care, compassion, and connection –no matter the source of our suffering – can be a welcome refuge, a safe place to touch into and remember there is much care and compassion already in the world.  Connecting with others in this way can offer us the pause we need to remember that we, too, care, feel compassion (quivering of the heart), and want to feel connected and safe.  Anywhere we meet with another is an opportunity to connect and share care, kindness, and compassion as basic values.

Who can hold a 4Cs meditation session:  Anyone when two or more people gather.  This might be our families, our workplaces, a volunteer organization we belong to, a gathering of friends, a workshop, or prayer group, a spiritual group. 

Place:  At the dining room table, in the conference room, in a living room, in a classroom, at the beginning of a meeting, at the coffee shop table, at the knitting circle, at men’s and women’s gatherings, at card games, in the lobby of the building.  Doesn’t matter where.

What:  Taking a pause to remember that we hold the values of care, compassion, kindness, and connection and wish to cultivate these wherever we go.  We may have a favorite set of phrases we use to remember and reconnect with our values.  We may use a quiet moment of meditation (silence and stillness) to touch into our wish for kindness, compassion, love and wisdom to lead for ourselves, others, and the world.  We may hold hands for a moment to remind ourselves we are all connected. Reading inspirational stories, poems, quotes.   

Examples:  (1)  Start a meeting with a reminder that we all care about others, and we are committed to bringing care and compassion to this table.  (2)  At the beginning of any gathering reporting on an event of care, kindness, compassion we witnessed or received.  (3)  Asking our workplace to set aside a 15-minute moment and space where all who wish may come together and remember that there are others who care and suffer as we do (i.e. every Thursday at 9am)  (4)  Ending a gathering with an intention or vow to practice care, kindness, compassion, and connection rather than divisiveness, harm, hatred, disdain of others. 

Begin by inviting others who you know want care, kindness, and compassion in the world to join you in a moment of remembering that we cultivate it right in this moment – not in any other moment – only this one. 

Begin by bringing it to your dining room table over family meals.

Begin by starting every meeting with a report on the ways care, kindness, compassion are being acted on and felt in the world.

Begin by looking for internet sites committed to these values and to reporting on the good news in the world.  Look for organizations committed to cultivating these values through their actions and activities. 

Begin by remembering every morning that you are committed to acting with care, compassion, kindness, and respect.  Set an intention or vow and read it every day. 

When a negative spiral begins, become aware, pause, and remember to look for the good.  Overcome the negativity bias. 

Use contemplative practices to grow the part of our brain that is devoted to care, kindness, compassion, and generosity. This has been shown by science.

Remember:  “Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule.”  Buddha.